6 Ways to Become Fully Present With Suffering

Life is about learning balance and how we interact with the world around us. It is a constant learning experience, to which we will become familiar with all of the emotions that a human being has, some of which are more pleasant than others.

Suffering on Earth is derived from the collective emotion held within humanity, which is why it is so important to learn to heal yourself first to help heal the planet.

As many great teachers of the past and present have taught us, often times it is not the experience itself that is the problem, it is how our human conditioning has taught us how to react. We’ve all experienced suffering in various ways.

Though it is uncomfortable and ugly, it is also very important to love each part of ourselves as human beings; to do that we have to understand the full spectrum of the human experience…the yin and the yang, the light and the dark. They co-exist together for a reason.

Aim to Be Like a Child

If you have children or have been around a small child, you will know that their experience of life is very different than yours. Their reactions are very in the moment. When they are upset, uncomfortable, or hungry they cry. There is no holding back, and no misunderstanding how they truly feel.

As we get older we learn what is considered an "acceptable" way to act in society. We learn that we can’t just have a meltdown anywhere when we are feeling upset. There are very specific circumstances that allow us to cry or feel angry, and some of us even go as far as to completely shut down our ability to feel our true emotions. I call this being "emotionally constipated!"

Babies’ ability to feel fully in the moment is a gift, because once they fully feel it, they release it instantaneously. There is no need to relive the experience later. It often takes very little to distract them with a new idea and change their emotion quickly. As we get older it is important to remember that innate wisdom within our bodies, because they react in direct correlation with the information we give them.

Fully Experience Your Emotions in the Moment

When your life is turned upside down and emotions are all over the place, take yourself into the moment and simply feel whatever disturbance is going on without resisting it. Take a chance and look silly in public if you need to.

When you can fully experience your emotions in the moment and let them wash over you, that turmoil will not collect in your body in a negative way. It is only when you deny and resist it that it collects and becomes unhealthy.

When you begin to feel imbalance in your life, the most effective way to take care of yourself is to honor where you are without judging the experience. Don’t compare yourself to others, because you are a unique individual!

Your experience is your experience, and there is no right or wrong or normal and abnormal. You are creating your body and life experience every day, and it’s unlike anyone else’s body or life experience.

6 Ways to Be Present with Suffering

Here are some steps you can take in a moment of distress and suffering to relieve yourself:

1. Stop whatever you are doing, and go inward. Listen to your body and become fully present.

Don’t try to change the way you feel in this moment. Instead, feel it for what it is without resisting it.

Say in your mind, "I honor this feeling of ______, even though it makes me uncomfortable or scared in this moment."

Focus on the sensation, and surround yourself in a beautiful picture that feels comfortable, loving, and safe to you. I like to picture myself in a field of flowers with a soft breeze blowing through me, washing away anything that no longer serves my highest good.

2. Let the emotions fly

Let yourself go! Experience the anger, frustration, sadness, joy, excitement, fear, surprise, disgust, disapproval, remorse, and all the in-betweens. The goal is to express it.

However, it is also important to remember to make sure you are not putting anyone in danger while you are doing this. Whatever you are feeling in this moment is perfect; there is nothing wrong with it!

3. Trust any messages that come through your body as divine guidance

You might notice some sensations, ideas, or thoughts through your body as you become fully present in your experience.

When we become still, we are more receptive to receiving divine guidance from our higher selves.

Trust this loving guidance, or simply soak in this beautiful light that is holding you. We all have access to it when we call upon it.

4. Stay Present

Stay with the feeling until you feel it has fully washed over you and can be released. Take your time and don’t be tempted to rush through it.

Remember your well-being is the most important thing right now. You cannot be present with others until you are fully present with yourself.

5. Wait for Release

Just like with a baby, sometimes it takes five minutes, and sometimes two hours before we reach a point of release, but it eventually always comes.

Most of us force ourselves to get up and "shake it off" before we’re really ready. All that leftover emotion builds up and is stored within the body, despite our belief that it is gone once we choose to think it’s gone. Once the release happens, the weight falls off and you can now resume your day with your full presence.

6. Remember That You’re Not Alone

When you’re feeling suffering of any kind in life (and there are many!), remember you’re not alone. Remember to claim your strength and ask for help when you need it. You can’t do it all on your own.

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JULIEA, posted on September 20, 2015

Hi Wina, this is Courtney. So nice to see your comment!! I agree, believing you just need to "buck up" does more harm than good - because in the end, the dominant vibration you are sending out is of resistance, not acceptance. Totally get it. Then again, when you do put your intention out, and you know it is pure and clear, I do believe it is then time to realize it is being taken care of, and it's time to rest and know it's in God's hands. But it's a co-creative process - half of your work and half of letting go to Spirits work. We're one. I appreciate your comment and you being strong and courageous enough to share your feelings here. Remember we are all on our own journeys, and it can be difficult to see others on a path that is something you would not choose yourself or for them, but know that it's all divinely orchestrated. We each have a path we are co-creating for the purpose of our highest growth and development. Sometimes it takes a little more oomph for others, but in the end, we're all going to the same place that we came from, and it's all good :-)

wina1960, posted on September 11, 2015

I have been saying this for years. Allowing people to dictate how I should react to things I quit being in the moment and never fully feeling and releasing the emotions has taken a physical, mental, and emotional toll on me. Allowing people to tell me that it is all in God's hands and to buck up did more harm than good.

My husband buries his emotions. He has grief way back to his time in Vietnam that comes out in inappropriate ways when he has been drinking. He says he is "self medicating" when in actuality he is just releasing the inhibitions for him to act out his issues.

I am coming back to the practice of dealing with issues in the "now". I am encouraging my husband to do so also. Thank you for posting this article.

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