Busy Mom? 3 Easy Ways to Practice Self-Care
Being a mother is one of the greatest gifts in life. It is filled with joy and immeasurable love. However, let’s be honest here: it’s also exhausting, overwhelming and sometimes more frustrating and difficult than we imagined it would be. The kids are fighting, dinner needs to be made, the laundry hasn’t been folded in days, the baby needs a diaper change, the bills need to be paid, the dog needs to go out, you have a toddler pulling at your leg, and the list of things to do just keeps on getting bigger. Oh yeah, and then there’s you. Who, you might ask? You, the mom. You, the professional. You the entrepreneur. You, the wife. You, the friend. You. The one who regularly gets left off the to-do list.
Being a good mother requires us to be loving, nurturing, giving, kind and patient. These are traits, that despite the frenzy of daily life, we somehow manage to pull from our depths to offer our children. The question is, can we as moms offer those same traits to ourselves? As a mother and solo-preneur, I’ve learned the importance of self-care. And I also know how difficult it is to make it happen given the reality of life.
Why is it so difficult to make time for ourselves when we somehow manage to make time for everyone and everything else?
Probably because there are only 24 hours in the day and many of life’s other demands tend to scream much louder for your attention. “The squeaky wheel gets the oil.” If we stop and listen, we might notice that there’s another squeaky wheel that’s been begging for our attention: our own.
When we begin to talk about self-care for moms, the issue of guilt often arises. So let’s call it out, like the big elephant in the room: as women, we tend to have an easier time sacrificing ourselves than taking care of ourselves. Most of us would rather drop from exhaustion than face the guilt of caring for our own needs. However, when Mom is depleted, the whole household suffers. And when you take care of yourself, you can better take care of others.
For many women, we hear and understand the importance of self-care. The issue isn’t knowing what we should do; the issue is the logistics of it all. How do you fit self-care into an already overflowing schedule? Who has the time, energy or money for spa days, date nights, yoga classes, gym memberships, meditation or new hobbies?
So what’s a busy mom to do? How do we make time for ourselves while caring for our families, careers and communities?
Here are some practical solutions for putting your self-care back on your to-do list without having to drastically alter your life. These wellness practices have had an amazing impact on my own health and well-being, as well as that of my family. They’re simple, practical and easy to implement into any busy mom’s lifestyle.
Morning Affirmations
Begin your day when the world around you begins to awaken. Early morning is a special time of day, when you can best tune in to subtle energies. How we begin our day sets the tone for the rest of it. Waking up early allows for more time, more productivity and more leisure, making our days less stressful. Add a little TLC to your morning as you awaken and before you rise by practicing the following routine:
Lie on your back and place one hand on your heart and one hand on your low belly. Exhale deeply and sink into your body. Inhale the light of the day and imagine that light of love shining within you. Breathe in the words I am loved, supported and cared for and breathe out the words I love. Think of your spouse, partner, children and loved ones, and let that light of love expand within you and fill you.
Before you get out of bed, say to yourself, It’s going to be a good day! Starting your day like this will add intention and a sense direction to your day. We all struggle with the simple idea of loving ourselves as much as we love our children. When you take a moment to fill yourself with love and support first thing in the morning, you lower your stress levels and begin to tap into your own self-compassion.
Just Breathe
“Smile, breathe and go slowly.” ~Thích Nhất Hạnh
This quote from Thích Nhất Hạnh reminds me to move through my days with more ease and more joy. As you move through your days, notice when you are feeling tense, tired, stressed, tight or contracted. At that moment, exhale deeply and soften into the moment. Allow your body and your mind to soften and release their grip. Smile gently at yourself, at the moment, at the word. Take a deep inhale through the nose to the count of five, and exhale deeply for a count of five, allowing your shoulders to drop, your jaw to loosen in a soft smile, and your body and mind to relax.
Regular breathing practices help to calm the body and still the mind. This simple breathing technique will center and ground you, helping you feel less stressed and more energized. Cultivate the habit of breathing intentionally and notice a sense of calm and ease begin to weave itself into the fabric of your days.
Secure Your Oxygen Mask First
In Ayurveda, oxygen in your blood is called “Jivana,” meaning life-giving. Oxygen in your cells is literally the fuel behind your goals and intentions. Securing your oxygen mask first means we make time for ourselves first thing in the morning. Depending on your current routine, this might mean taking a few conscious deep breaths in the morning. Or it might be a brisk walk around the block. For some, it might be stepping onto your yoga mat as a cue to start moving and breathing with intention. The important thing is to build a sense of wholeness and a lightness in your body as a practice into your daily routine.
So take your oxygen mask first thing in the morning. Commit to moving your breath intentionally and clearing your channels before breakfast, before the day can get away from you. Practicing in the morning will affect your entire day, allowing you to make better, more conscious choices.
About the Author
How to Catch Your Dreams
Dreams are the easiest portal to the otherworld which we are granted in this human landscape. It is in these nighttime sojourns that we connect with Angels and Guides, converse with our Highest Self and are afforded the luxury to work out that which cannot be readily digested in our waking hours.
I’m always fascinated by this in between space, yet am heartily disappointed by traditional dream meanings. I prefer to dive into the shadowy depths of my own psyche without such pedestrian notions spelled out. Carl Jung perhaps posits the best path to decipher the meaning of our dreams. It is the archetypes – the rich characters whom we encounter – who can lead us best to extract the meaning of our dreams. As they each represent an aspect of self, unravel the archetype to see how this underlying energy or persona plays out for you presently.
Beyond the gentle soothing of rest and restoration, others have skillfully navigated psychic landscapes through this dark revery. David Wilcock, in his extensive dream work, has been able to predict many global events. Over the course of many years he meticulously journaled his dreams upon waking and was able to accurately extract their greater significance. Edgar Cayce, the sleeping prophet, was so skilled in these realms he was able to carry out precise and highly personalized readings for people. Unable to access such knowledge in his waking state, his dreams presented a doorway to far-reaching knowledge which helped thousands of individuals and still has lasting relevance today.
Here are some ways you can begin to tap into the powerful portals of the divine through your nighttime escapades.
Set an Intention
The universe, in its respect of free will, can only act in accordance with what we directly command. State an intention to easily and readily recall your dreams upon waking. I proclaim this aloud. Speaking things into being and giving vibrational frequency to your desires magnifies the likelihood of success.
Keep a Dream Journal
To best utilize this nighttime landscape for yourself, record your dreams as soon as you wake. Keep a journal by the bed and make a habit to jot some notes in the morning. More than the specific encounters and details, I find the feelings evoked are more telling.
Personal Dream Interpretation
It is helpful to go back over these jottings from time to time to see what has transpired. Don’t grab a dream interpretation book, instead seek to decipher your own meaning in hindsight. Can you see your own archetypes and patterns at play? Once you identify themes and key players you can more readily understand your dreams as they occur. This is a refined process that takes time to develop well.
Once you can navigate your own internal landscape, you can more readily make use of the profound insight being shared.
Crystals for Dreaming
Crystals are allies for all occasions but potently paired with dream work. A crystal under your pillow will aid in the retention and recall of your dreams. You can easily program a crystal to support any intention you wish but it is especially helpful to store, or encode, dreams. Upon waking pick up the crystal and hold it while you capture your escapades.
Beyond recall, other benefits of crystals for dreams are:
- Amethyst – a gentle crystal which aids in restful sleep; psychic stone of the crown chakra helpful for deepening dream states
- Ametrine – connection with highest self, it creates a portal for this wisdom to be transmitted to you
- Azurite – 3rd eye opener, can bring through spirit guides, past life memories and the connection with psychic gifts
- Quartz – best for programming to act as an ally for dream recall
- Modlavite – a powerful generator which illuminates personal issues and brings them to the surface, aids in lucid dreaming
Dream Guide Meditation
Allow yourself the space to delve into this guided meditation to meet with a Spirit Guide offering assistance for you in your dream work. Gently and easily meet with a guide that is personally devoted to you.
- Close your eyes and breathe deeply into your belly
- See yourself in the night sky, held by a blanket of velvety stars
- You will see in the distance a platform of pure white crystal
- Stand atop this stage and request that a Dream Guide join you
- Spend time getting to know this guide. Feel their vibration, request a name and ask how this partnership may best unfold
- When you are complete, thank your ally and commit to accepting the assistance
- Stand alone atop the platform to receive restorative cosmic blessings of the universe
- Slowly bring yourself back to your physical body feeling these offerings of abundance
- Commit to invoking this guide nightly and connecting again upon waking to best utilize the support offered
Dream Catcher
You may have seen these beauteous decorations hanging from walls and rear view mirrors. The dream catcher looks much like a spider’s web and is said to catch the nightmares. Peaceful, blissful and supportive dreams are able to pass through with ease and support you.
The ritual use of these sacred objects is well documented. Beyond ornamental, they are handmade with great care and created for a specific individual in mind.
The tradition began with the Obijway Native Americans. Made from sinews, or plant fibers, and hung over sleeping children, the web would catch the bad dreams and allow the good dreams to pass easily through the hole in the center. When the morning sun illuminates the dream catcher the bad dreams would be vanquished.
How to Make Your Own Dream Catcher
Used as a scared object the dream catcher can have a beneficial effect on sleeping and dream recall. Whether literal or a placebo effect, crafting your own object of power for your nighttime journeys can be a space of deep connection and healing.
1. Gather Sacred Items
Traditional dream catchers include bone, feathers, crystals and beads. Find your own items that convey special meaning. Remember that the final design will be rather delicate so avoid heavy objects.
2. Choose the Frame
You’ll need a 2-6 foot length of pliable material. Red willow or soaked grapevine are easy to obtain from a craft store. Remember, this is a sacred quest and gathered items should feel important to you. Invoke Spirit to lead you to the best suited materials for you.
3. Weave the Hoop
Perhaps the most ritualistic step of creating a dream catcher is in weaving the sinew through the hoop. Take this on as a sacred task. All myths carry stories of weavers – to the Nordics it was the Norns, or Sisters of Wyrd, to the Native Americans it was Spider Woman. Weaving is the act of creating the web of time, the very fabric of reality, and is a channel for all manifestation, spiritual work and healing. While you weave your hoop, hold your intention close to your heart and chant your selected mantra(s).
Many tutorials are available on how to create this sacred art yourself. Intention is key and the finished project will carry your intentions.
Your dreams are a most personal gift and direct link with the divine. Making conscious use of this nighttime travel will aid spiritual development and support your path of Ascension. Use it well lovey and know there is no more powerful way to access your Highest Self!
