5 Misconceptions About Introverts
Being a little bit more on the introverted side can be tough. When everyone is clamoring to stay out late, hang out in huge groups, or meet lots of new people, being extroverted starts looking very good. In fact, others who don’t understand introverts might start assuming things about them, either through stereotypes or by observing their behavior.
There is a lot more going on underneath the surface, however, and a lot of misconceptions about introverts that should be broken:
Shy
“Shy” is a general term we call people who are quiet, don’t open up in crowds, and maybe even a little bit afraid of social interaction. This doesn’t cover the whole story of introverts. The core of being an introvert means being energized by being alone and being drained by being around other people. Just because someone is an introvert doesn’t make her scared of being around others. Instead, it’s something that happens inside. It is more of an internal energy shift that happens when an introvert is surrounded by people not already admitted to her comfort zone.
Snobby
True blue introverts find themselves challenged to just slide their way into groups of people or to strike up conversation randomly. Their nature urges them to simply keep to themselves. Although some may look at this and think that the introverts feel superior to others, it isn’t true. It just means they aren’t comfortable in these situations; remember, they’re the ones getting their energy drained by big groups. You’d be uncomfortable, too.
Hatred of Being Social
As mentioned, there is a distinct “circle” of people who are no longer in the energy drain category for introverts. This means that an introvert is entirely capable of being just as loud and fun as any extrovert, but only when with this “safe” people who they are comfortable with. Socializing with the right group can actually offer lots of positive energy to an introvert. However, bringing even one stranger into the group can cause an introvert to retreat back into her comfort zone, so keep this in mind.
Comfortable Where They Are
If you seem confident and easygoing in a group, chances are good that you’ve caught an introvert’s envious eye. The mere idea of easing into a strange group of people can be an extreme challenge, even to the point of being painful to some introverts. That doesn’t mean that they don’t occasionally wish to be capable of including themselves in these situations.
Introspection
There’s not just empty air wafting around between an introvert’s ears! Just because she’s sitting quietly doesn’t mean that she’s not very active mentally. Deep thoughts are most likely running through the introvert’s mind at any given moment. Sound weighty? It is! All this thinking adds to the difficulty of jumping into a group of people. An introvert’s mind is very powerful, and quite often an introvert thinks too hard about a situation (“What should I say? Should I smile more often? What is he thinking about?”). This makes it hard to relax and let the good energy flow.
Throw away all of your labels the next time you meet anyone of any age range who may seem snobby or shy to you. Like all human beings, introverts need understanding. Be respectful of the fact that we are all different, and we all need a little love. So be friendly (in a calm, unintimidating way) to the next introvert you meet. Or if you are an introvert, smile knowing that you are unique, special and perfect just the way you are.
Want to understand introverts and extroverts’ hard-wiring even more? This infographic breaks it down very nicely:
About the Author
Amma: The Loving, Hugging, Humanitarian Saint
As of the date of this article, Amma has hugged attendees to her programs over 40 million times. Her free events attract thousands upon thousands of people, often taking place in football stadiums. In the early days, when 50 or 60 people were in attendance, Amma was known as “Ammaji” or “Ammachi.”
It was 1990 when I first met Amma. She was seated on a tattered, cushioned chair in the center of a small, basement room in The African-Methodist Episcopal Church in Central Square, Cambridge, MA.
The moment I walked into the room, I was so profoundly struck by Amma’s light and presence that I fell to my knees and bowed to her. I spent the rest of the day sobbing in absolute bliss, happily crouched in a corner. In addition to a few Swamis and helpers, there were less than ten other people in the room.
While indulging my tears, Amma caught my eye and invited me to her chair. I was so nervous, I could barely speak. I walked toward her, awkward and self-conscious, as if it were my first time walking. I bowed and she immediately took my hand, then gently bent me across her lap.
Amma then gently rubbed my body from head to toe while I cried. She massaged my scalp and forehead and patted my spine. Amma even squeezed my ears and tussled my hair. It felt as though I were embraced by the most loving bundle of light.
After 20 minutes of her healing touch, Amma lifted my head with her soft hands and pressed her cheek and lips against my ear. She lovingly whispered Sanskrit mantras to me as I absorbed every morsel of her love.
